The Funny Things People Say

One of things I've noticed since getting married is that my husband David, is hilarious. Don't get me wrong, I knew he was funny before we tied the knot but now I get to see his funnier side more often. Here is a sample of what I get to enjoy on a daily basis.


David: I just woke up from a dream that I was eating a steak. When I woke up, my arm hurt and had bite marks. Watch yourself tonight my dear. Watch yourself.


After reading this text I was slightly confused. Is he serious? I showed it to ALL the girls in the office. Partly for their amusement and partly for their opinion. They weren't helpful. They all ended up asking me, "Is he serious?" I know David loves throwing me curve balls just for fun but this one seemed a little out there.


Candis: Are you serious?


It only took him a moment to reply...


David: No, I just told you a lie for no reason... of course I was serious, haha.


Now, I knew the danger of being fanged was real. I needed to know how risky it was to sleep in the same bed as him that night. I mean, if I wake up with bite marks all over and go to work, that's not good. I guess I could say I was attacked by some critter. That's partly true I suppose... So, as I contemplated this unusual situation, my lunch break came around. So Corin and I headed out for fast food and discussed the situation. I decided it would be to my benefit to inquire further into these bite marks.


Me: Take a photo with your phone. I want to see these bite marks.


David: No. You are going to show or tell Corin. You are so mean!


Holy cow, this guy reads me like a book. Corin and I were laughing so hard. Of course I was going to show Corin. Who wouldn't show Corin? So I tried to be sneaky.


Me: Why don't you trust me?


Sneakiness backfired.


David: Because you have already told her! I know!


Oh snap! How does he know me so well? We were just texting. I swear that kid is psychic sometimes. Anyways, after a little more banter he told me the marks had faded. Now, I won't know how bad it was 'til it's too late. I'm done for! I thought to myself. Then I realized I had one more shot.

Me: I'm sleeping on the couch tonight to avoid maulings. :) I still love you.


There, that should do it, I thought to myself. I mean, how could David be upset if I volunteer to sleep on the couch. I think it is beside the point that the couch is more comfortable than the bed.


David: Haha, please. I'll get you regardless :) I want to eat you up just like a cannibal, cause you're so sweet to me!


Haha those are the lyrics from his friend's band from highschool. At that point I was feeling the grip of defeat, I just had to wait to face it that night.


I woke up the next morning to find that I had a stuffed nose and was unscathed. Apparently, I was making awful sounds that kept David up. Who would've thought about that safety mechanism?

Oh! And one of the best parts is... I got a picture anyways :)

Time to Move

Well, it's time for me to jump ship. It's been a lot of fun living in Centennial. I've met a lot of amazing people here and made a lot of really good friends. The memories I have of this place are amazing but I'm excited to pack up and move on to a new adventure :)

Although, I have just realized a crisis that exists here in Provo for housing situations. Apparently, a lot of contracts end on the 18th and the move-in date is around the 24th. This doesn't add up. I fear we are currently facing a housing crisis. I mean, that's almost a week of having nowhere to go. I propose that we have the BYU housing contract people ammend this clearly cruel injustice. Imagine, I'm sure there are some folks out there getting a week long trial pass for Golds Gym just so they can shower. Oh, the inhumanity of it all.

But I have to say it's all worth it because I get to live with 3 of my best friends. I'M SO EXCITED! THIS YEAR IS GOING TO BE A PARTY (and Corin you can't poop on this one).

He Met the Parents

Last night David met my parents and my little brother Jared.

This is pretty huge. I've never introduced my parents to a guy I'm dating. This is usually due to the fact that I'm in the USA and they're up in Canada. Somehow though, we got it organized for them to come to San Fran to meet him :)

It was pretty interesting to say the least. I've come to realize that I'm never mature when I'm around my 11-year-old brother. My parents still threatened us that they wouldn't bring us back to the restaurant. It was worth it though. Fun to play around with Jared, I haven't been able to do that since the beginning of the summer.

Anyways we went to Olive Garden for dinner and David was able to see me with my family. He already loves them. We're pretty disfunctional but we somehow work as a family unit. I'm glad he approves.

My family likes him too which is perfect :) my dad told me as he left to go to his room for the night that he was proud of me. My mom told me she thought we were so cute together. Jared kept trying to intervene when we kissed. He was way more forward about stopping our intentions than Danny, David's younger brother. Danny saw how I was looking at David so in an act of desperation he reached out and grabbed David's hand. David freaked. Danny won. Jared overall definitely lost even though he kept trying to stick his hand between our faces. Bahaha

Jared was a very protective younger brother. He even insisted on coming out to say goodnight to David with me. Therefore he cut our goodnighting short. Clever boy.

It'll be interesting to see what happens today. :)

I Love My Job

Imagine, being able to hike around the mountains, taking in spectacular views, digging in the dirt and soaking up the sun. I get paid to do that.

I work up in Ephraim doing research for a prof of mine at BYU. We are measuring how the environment will deal with different types of water stresses. We have a control plot and five different treatments at each site. Two of the plots get 70% or 30% less water overall. The other two plots have roofs on them that allow the rain to drain into barrels instead of watering the plots. With the barrel water collected, we water the plots either once a week or once every three weeks. Various measurements are taken from these plots. For instance IER bags are placed in the plots, cover estimates, microbial respiration, infiltration etc. It's pretty sweet. I also get to be out in that glorious place three days a week. It's okay, you can be jealous Above is K Site and below is Watershed B site is below

sometimes you have to let things go

There are times in everyone's life that you see friends doing things that are... silly. And as the friend of wisdom you have two options A) Tell them they are being stupid and to come to their senses. This may mean you need to take a stand that your friend won't listen to. It may lead to you having your friend go on making their silly choice without you in their life. B) You tell them you want them to be happy and you want what's best for them. Even if you know they are walking into their own disaster. That way - at least - you can be there to catch them as they walk off their cliff of choice.

You can't have both. The closest thing you can have to both is by politely pointing out your friend is an idiot. After that goes disasterously wrong you proceed to apologize for your lack of faith in their decision. Then you stand by for the fall out. The one you accurately predicted initially however, in these situations I-told-you-so isn't appropriate.

None of the choices are pretty. You have to sacrifice something in all options. So which is the best way to handle situations like these?

Whenever I'm faced with this terrible scenario I usually do B) or the combination silent I-told-you-so. I may have to swallow my pride and I may need to stand by and watch my friend get hurt. I feel like, though, if they're going to do it anyways I might as well be there when they need me. Not everyone can take advice in all cases. Some people just need to experience things for themselves. I understand that. It's still hard to watch people you love go through painful experiences that they could have easily sidestepped in their journey through life. Sometimes you can't help them avoid pain, you can just be there to hold their hand as they experience it.

Bah Sickness

I think one of the WORST things in the world is illness. You have nothing if you don't have your health. I am reflecting on this because currently... I am a biohazard to the human race. I feel like the living dead and I'm sure I look close to it. I'm glad my zombie-slaying friend Carl can't see me like this. It would probably not end well for me. Carl would probably get a new hi-score.

It's been alarming though, to be sick in my apartment. You see, Rachel, one of my other roommates has been stricken with the mono. She has been away the majority of the last couple of weeks being tended to by her family. Mono can be incubated I think 4-5 weeks in adults before you actually get sick. So the fact that I have been sick has made me frightened. Fortunately I have found a way to avoid the $15 doctor's fee to be told I have mono and that there is nothing I can do about it. I have google. Ah, google, the interenet would not be complete without it.

Google is sooo crafty. That pacman version of theirs was just delightful today. Anyways, google allowed me to figure out what symptoms would strongly indicate that I was a victim to mono. My lifesaver was that my lymph nodes are not swollen. YES!However, maybe I have some weird foreign disease that you see on House and I am actaually really going to die. You know what the worst day to die on would be? April 1st I bet a bunch of people would think that, that's a bad joke. That would get awkward. Haha that would be kind of funny to die on April 1st.

Well, I am (self diagnosed) mono free and don't have to explain anything to David, my boyfriend. Although, I don't have anything that needs explaining. I'm just saying... yeah. If I had acquired mono it would have been from accidentally drinking her juice or something.

I know I'll be better by Sunday for sure. Why can I state that with such confidence? Well, you see, there is a presidency workshop meeting that I must attend at 7AM on Sunday and it would be far too convenient for me to be sick on the early morning of that day.

Well, I'm going back to watching online tv shows like 'the Big Bang Theory' and 'My Life as Liz'